K1u Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Do not consider this as just another ploy to get traffic onto my site. I honestly want feedback. Ever since I was young I had the dream of operating a forum like the ones I would go on, the millions of users and the one admin with the iron fist who is worshipped like a god. The flamewars, the constant delivery of content, the idea and the feeling of being part of a community of actual people. The thought of being this worshipped lord admin intrigued me so much, having a legion of people to attack on flame to defend their precious admin. The power I wanted was similar to how a drug abuser might feel. I had a strong urge for this ultimate power. Years pass. I buy a domain, I get together a team of my good friends... THEN IT BEGINS! The curse. The late nights I spent constantly refreshing the who's online panel, looking for new guests or possible registrations, eye'ing new users so carefully. Re-trying board layouts after board layouts after board layouts, NEVER STOPPING, like a addict my grades drop and everything else in life is worthless. I care beyond what words can describe about my community, wanting to be SUPERIOR than other forums, WANTING TO BE HAILED by members! The late nights continue constantly, anger and rage, I cry in anger and passion so much I want to break and destroy, but I am stopped. Constant changes in forum software, the constant lines of php code running through my brain, all I can think of is the forum. The template changes, the forum changes, deleted, reinstalled, thrown away, regained, attacked, loved, hated. Pain and anger is all I feel. For my true and only dream in life is this. Registering on so many forums, I NEVER STOP, the rage, bloodshot eyes at 4 AM. My parents always questioning why they see a board and me just refreshing and refreshing. I post and I post, I advertise and I advertise. Will it ever stop? Will it? Features implemented, features removed, life lost, hope gained. What is the end goal? For I am just another... Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admin. Is it love for the forum or is it love for the community? Behind it all it is just for the community. For I am just another... Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admin. Is it hate or is it love? Why do I spend oh-so-much time? For I am just another... Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admin. Will it stop? What is wrong? Who am I? For I am just another... Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admin. I post and post I post and post. I make up almost 95% of the forums posts. Why? Why am I just another... Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admin. Well who knows? The ideas never stop. Maybe some good will come out of this, maybe some day I will have the community I beg for. For I am just another... Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admin. Lost in the grips of web 2.0, with the internet users wanting more, who am I but just another admin. <3 goes out to all others in my situation. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomeoneE1se Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 ... ...I.... ... um... ... You know what, nevermind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 20, 2008 Author Share Posted April 20, 2008 ... ...I.... ... um... ... You know what, nevermind. I know you really have a urge to flame to fuck out of me. Many people do. I had to let this out, I had to express how I felt. Some way or another. Hate me or love me. There are tons and tons of guys out there in the same mess as me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomeoneE1se Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 I know you really have a urge to flame to fuck out of me. Many people do. Why do you think that is? There are tons and tons of guys out there in the same mess as me. name 2 (that are not your friends) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 20, 2008 Author Share Posted April 20, 2008 I know you really have a urge to flame to fuck out of me. Many people do. Why do you think that is? There are tons and tons of guys out there in the same mess as me. name 2 (that are not your friends) Because you do not understand my situation. I can not name 2 that are not my friends, because I do not know that much random people. And I am friends with a ton of people. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomeoneE1se Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Because you do not understand my situation. that's a total teenager cop-out I can not name 2 that are not my friends, because I do not know that much random people. And I am friends with a ton of people. online friendships don't count. I'm talking about people you know face to face (video chat is not face to face) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 20, 2008 Author Share Posted April 20, 2008 I do not use video chat. And you are the only person opposed to this thread. I have posted it on various places and showed it to many people. Do you have something personal against me? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomeoneE1se Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 And you are the only person opposed to this thread. I am not opposed to this thread and I wasn't even going to flame you... Still waiting on the 2 people too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 20, 2008 Author Share Posted April 20, 2008 And you are the only person opposed to this thread. I am not opposed to this thread and I wasn't even going to flame you... Still waiting on the 2 people too. I can name 2 friends... but not 2 people. If you knew me you would know I only keep my friends close. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
owine Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 You're a freak dude. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tim.vangehugten Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Cut (litteraly) your internet cables then you can't go on the net and you have to do something else. Read a book or make some firework or get a girlfriend, I don't know just think about it 8) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
digip Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 If you only wanted to be a forum admin to get people to respect or worship you, you got into it for the wrong reasons. Forum admins usually aren't regarded with such high esteem just because of their title. They earn the respec of the users and people around them based on their sound judgement and respect for the others on the forums. The ability to moderate with fairness while being firm usually gets you more respect than just trying to have a legion of fanbois come to your rescue when someone flames you. The only "Paranoid Lonely Hopeless Admins" are the ones who are obsessed with something that has nothing to do with the forums they run. There is life outside of the confines of your computer desk. There are people out there in "RL". There other things you can be doing instead of obsessing over your computer and the internet. The forums arent going anywhere, they will still be there when you come back to them days later. It sounds like you have an addiction and until you get help, your only going to get worse. Seriously. Try turning off your pc for a few days. Not hours, but DAYS. Can you go up to 5 days without using your pc? If you can't make it at least 48 hours, then you need to talk to someone about getting some help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
VaKo Posted April 20, 2008 Share Posted April 20, 2008 Ever since I was young I had the dream of operating a forum like the ones I would go on, the millions of users and the one admin with the iron fist who is worshipped like a god. The flamewars, the constant delivery of content, the idea and the feeling of being part of a community of actual people. The thought of being this worshipped lord admin intrigued me so much, having a legion of people to attack on flame to defend their precious admin. The power I wanted was similar to how a drug abuser might feel. I had a strong urge for this ultimate power. Years pass. I buy a domain, I get together a team of my good friends... THEN IT BEGINS! The curse. The late nights I spent constantly refreshing the who's online panel, looking for new guests or possible registrations, eye'ing new users so carefully. Re-trying board layouts after board layouts after board layouts, NEVER STOPPING, like a addict my grades drop and everything else in life is worthless. I care beyond what words can describe about my community, wanting to be SUPERIOR than other forums, WANTING TO BE HAILED by members! Ultimate power? Bahahahaaahaaaa!! 99 times out of 100 its deciding which group of people your going to piss off less. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 21, 2008 Author Share Posted April 21, 2008 Ever since I was young I had the dream of operating a forum like the ones I would go on, the millions of users and the one admin with the iron fist who is worshipped like a god. The flamewars, the constant delivery of content, the idea and the feeling of being part of a community of actual people. The thought of being this worshipped lord admin intrigued me so much, having a legion of people to attack on flame to defend their precious admin. The power I wanted was similar to how a drug abuser might feel. I had a strong urge for this ultimate power. Years pass. I buy a domain, I get together a team of my good friends... THEN IT BEGINS! The curse. The late nights I spent constantly refreshing the who's online panel, looking for new guests or possible registrations, eye'ing new users so carefully. Re-trying board layouts after board layouts after board layouts, NEVER STOPPING, like a addict my grades drop and everything else in life is worthless. I care beyond what words can describe about my community, wanting to be SUPERIOR than other forums, WANTING TO BE HAILED by members! Ultimate power? Bahahahaaahaaaa!! 99 times out of 100 its deciding which group of people your going to piss off less. Haha, I love to add a little humor to my writings :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moonlit Posted April 21, 2008 Share Posted April 21, 2008 Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 21, 2008 Author Share Posted April 21, 2008 Oh dear. Oh dear, oh dear. ? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moonlit Posted April 21, 2008 Share Posted April 21, 2008 Now, I could be fairly confident that this thread is something of a cry for attention but I'll take the time to explain my post, for what it's worth. See, those two posts you quoted? They weren't joking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 21, 2008 Author Share Posted April 21, 2008 Now, I could be fairly confident that this thread is something of a cry for attention but I'll take the time to explain my post, for what it's worth. See, those two posts you quoted? They weren't joking. Oh god... here comes the epic flame. Oh well... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
moonlit Posted April 21, 2008 Share Posted April 21, 2008 I don't believe I flamed anyone in that post, nor do I intend to until a reason arises that prompts it. I stick by my previous post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deveant Posted April 21, 2008 Share Posted April 21, 2008 i don't think anyone has flamed as of yet, just voiced there opinions. As for mine the best admins are for sites with a purpose, the reason the admin gets respect, is because he knows allot about what the sites for. Example. Ive just finished programing a Melb Shuffle Site for a mate, on his boards his pretty well off, though only 500~ members 150 perm active. Though they like him for a reason, hes awsum at shuffle, and hes know on the scene. You dont get the respect for owning the site, and u still need something to draw many users to your site. Check moot for exaple, thought who know his site, know its a rather large one lol, and not many like him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chris Gerling Posted April 22, 2008 Share Posted April 22, 2008 Turn off your computer for a few days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
K1u Posted April 22, 2008 Author Share Posted April 22, 2008 Turn off your computer for a few days. Yeah maybe for this weekend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tim.vangehugten Posted April 22, 2008 Share Posted April 22, 2008 Turn off your computer for a few days. Yeah maybe for this weekend. what maybe? don't use the word "maybe", just do it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SomeoneE1se Posted April 22, 2008 Share Posted April 22, 2008 Turn off your computer for a few days. Yeah maybe for this weekend. what maybe? don't use the word "maybe", just do it. qfe Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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